Dear Ann Landers, I belong to an informal dinner club that meets once a month for dinner in one of our homes. One of the women has appointed herself "social director" and is making our lives miserable.
"Irene" phones everyone to remind them of the upcoming dinner plans, which is fine. The problem is that she always tells the hostess what to serve. She does not have food allergies or any medical problems; she just likes certain things. Irene eats enough for two people, so making an extra dish for her is a major annoyance.
The rest of us in the group do not want to disband, and Irene would be terribly hurt if we excluded her. Any suggestions? -- Too Much Cooking in Alabama
Dear T.M.C., Since the major problem seems to be that Irene is too managerial, simply ignore her suggestions about what to serve. You do not owe her special privileges, or quadruple helpings. Treat her cordially, and make sure all the members have their first helping before Irene has her second -- and third.
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!
Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!
, I would call a meeting with the club and indicate that it's a new year and we're going to do things a little differently whoever holds the dinner will be responsible for selecting a menu and also whatever activities we will be doing for the remainder of the evening this way you don't have to say anything to her but you do it as if it's a group decision everyone should be happy and if they don't then oh well
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Dear Readers, , My x-girlfriend who lived with my son and I for 16 years died of cancer. Prior before we knew she had cancer-she moved out because of an addiction problem. We did stay very close before she died. Her x-husband an attorney took over her finances and the burial arrangements. I being financially set was okay with that, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.