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Dear Ann Landers,
am the mother of two small children. I have a job outside my home. All of this keeps me extremely busy. I have never had the time or felt a real desire to write to you before today. An outraged reader recently wrote to you about global warming and the so-called greenhouse effect. Please read the enclosed story from the San Bernardino Sun in California. "University researchers will strap gas-measuring equipment to cows to find out how bovine belching might be contributing to the green-house effect. Washington State University researchers will get $70,000 a year for three years from the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency to determine how much methane cows and other cud-chewing animals make when they belch." I never would have believed it if someone just told me about this. It sounds like some of the sensational garbage that you might see in a su-permarket tabloid. Ann, please tell me this isn't true. I hate to think our Environmental Protection Agency is throwing away money on such an absurd re-search project. If they would like some suggestions for their $70,000, I'd like to remind them of the homeless and hungry people in our country. -Redlands, Calif.

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Dear Readers,
, or should I say the cook. (There is no manager, just the waitress and me.) I am in charge. The waitress is also a pothead. Every night, we end up smoking about six joints each. There isn’t a day that goes by that I’m not stoned out of my mind. Anyone who thinks the effects of pot are gone after the high wears off might as well hang it up. I really don’t know how to say this, but pot affects your head permanently. I now have a severe mental blockage. I’m losing my memory, and it’s frightening. I said I’m a cook. Sometimes when I get an order while I’m stoned, I’ll repeat the order and turn around to make it. Then, I’ll forget what it was and have to go back and ask. So, those of you who want to smoke pot or are just starting, ask yourself a few questions. Do you want to lose your memory in your teens and see it get worse every day? Thanks for listening, Ann, and please keep on printing that terrific column.

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"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."
-Ann Landers