Dear Margo, The father of my best friend from the 80s and 90s has just died. I was told by his wife about twenty years ago that they did not want to be friends any longer so I have not spoken with him, or her, for twenty years. I guess I could have contacted my friend behind his wife's back, but I didn't, and he has never made an effort to contact me. I would like to send him my condolences and to tell him I know how he feels, as I recently lost my own fatheras well. Should I just let it go or should I contact him to offer my sympathy? - Gary
Dear Gary, It is never wrong to do the kind thing. By all means write your old friend a note of condolence. He might not respond, but then again, he might. Because you do not seem to know the reason for the fractured friendship, a repair may or may not be possible. In any case, you will have done the right thing and satisfied your own desire to offer solace to your old friend. - Margo
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Dear Readers, , My x-girlfriend who lived with my son and I for 16 years died of cancer. Prior before we knew she had cancer-she moved out because of an addiction problem. We did stay very close before she died. Her x-husband an attorney took over her finances and the burial arrangements. I being financially set was okay with that, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.