Dear Ann Landers,
Four children, two adults, one bathroom. The girls, fifteen and seventeen, usually get in first. They spend about twenty minutes (together) putting on makeup and combing each other's hair. This makes the boys, ten and twelve, furious. Some mornings the boys get up early and try to beat their sisters into the bathroom. When they succeed, the girls bang on the door and raise such a ruckus my husband (who doesn't have to go to work until noon) gets out of bed and adds to the bedlam by screaming at them. I've begged my husband for a second bathroom, but he says, "We had nine kids in our family and the bathroom was outside. We managed to grow up all right."-Tired Blood

Dear Tired,
If it's any consolation to you, Madame, a house with four kids and one bathroom is usually happier than a house with four bathrooms and no children. Hold a family conference. Tell the girls what time to go in and what time to get out. Buy them a wall mirror so they can apply their makeup and comb their hair in the bedroom. Make it clear that if the girls don't go in on schedule, they lose their place to the boys. This should end the Battle of the Bathroom, which, incidentally, is an old, familiar all-American sport.