Dear Ann Landers,
am sick to death of reading articles titled "Who Is Boss in Your Family?" "The Lady Wears the Pants," or "What Has Happened to Man's Role in Society?" Please tell me what a wife can do when her husband refuses to behave like a grown-up man. Somebody in the family must 147 make decisions, and my husband simply won't do it. He is lethargic and indecisive. If a bill doesn't get paid, he couldn't care less. The house has been falling apart for two years, and he hasn't even noticed. Although he is a carpenter, he refuses to pick up a hammer around here. I have to hire a man to make the repairs or I make them myself. The only thing my husband does with no prodding is drink. He is gassed every weekend.-Married To A Grown-Up Baby

Dear Married,
People find each other for a reason. Now you know why he found you. Or did you find him, the doll? Wives who are movers and shakers were aggressive before marriage. They intentionally selected a man who needed to be moved and shaken, or they let such a man select them. Now do you get it? Dear Ann: Last October our seventeen-year-old son asked his father and me to sign papers so he could be married. We agreed because his girl friend was four months' pregnant. Her parents came over with their minister and an uncle who is a prizefighter. The marriage lasted four months. My husband had to pay for the divorce, which he did happily because he couldn't stand the sight of the girl. Last week the boy asked us to sign more papers because he has met another girl he would like to marry. This girl is not in a family way, but she is twenty- three years old and has two children by a former marriage. Our son swears he knows what he is doing this time and is begging us to let him prove it. What should we do?-Gray For A Reason Dear Gray: Your son is seventeen years of age. He already has a marriage, a child, and a divorce, and now he wants to get married again. And you are asking me whether or not to let him??!! The answer is no! Your son is not ready for mar-riage, and if you sign those papers you'd better start saving your money for another divorce. 148 Dear Ann: I wrote to you recently about the problems I was having with my husband. You suggested we see a licensed marriage counselor. Yesterday was our third visit. When we left the marriage counselor's olhce, my husband was in a surly mood and said he didn't feel like driving. He ordered me to take the wheel. I was feeling punk and told him I'd rather not drive. He got in the driver's seat, gunned the motor, and raced down the highway at eighty miles an hour, reading the news-paper at the same time. I informed him he was behaving childishly and I was shocked that he would risk my life as well as his own just to prove I'd better give him his way or suffer the consequences. Now we aren't speaking. Was I wrong to refuse to drive?-Mixed Up Dear Mixed: Did you need this incident as proof that your husband is grossly immature? You should have anticipated his petulant and punitive behavior and taken the wheel no matter how punk you felt. Better to arrive home ill than dead.