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Dear Ann Landers,
My husband is a letteraholic. He writes to old girlfriends he hasn't seen in years and women he finds in coffee shops. He romances them with his poetry, and sometimes he sends roses. Recently, I caught him pulling feathers from my canary and sending them as sensitive gifts from "Nature Boy." Last week, I found a letter he hadn't mailed. It was an invitation to "have coffee and get better acquainted." That's the first step. The second step is lunch. Then, he tries to get them into bed. He keeps a post office box for some of the women's letters, and others come to our home with no return address. Several times a week, I pick up the phone, and the caller hangs up. Of course, I know it's one of his lady friends. I have accepted the fact that my husband will never change and am resigned to a life that includes his chasing women. I just wish these women would give me a break. If they call and I answer, they can ask for my husband, and I will get him, no questions asked. The same goes for those letters without return addresses. Women who slip around with married men should be aware that the wives almost always know what's going on. So, please give us credit for having some sense. We have subscribed to the Ann Landers formula, "Ask yourself, would your life be better with him or without him?" Most of us have decided we would be better off WITH him. -- Nameless, Of Course

Dear Nameless,
Many women would throw the bum out and suffer financial consequences that can be devastating, especially if there are children. My applause for handling this situation in the way that is best for you.

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A Note from Margo:
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!

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Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:

Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful."
-Ann Landers