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Section: grief-and-loss

Dear Ann Landers,
I had to smile when I read the letter from "Tom," whose friend still has his deceased wife's voice on the answering machine. My wife programmed all the machines in our house. If she were to die before me, you can bet all those machines would stay exactly as they are now. Tom's friend does not need grief counseling. What he needs is someone to come over and show him how to work the darned machine. -- Technologically Challenged in Maryland

Dear Technologically Challenged,
I was pleased to hear from you because I am also a member of your "club." Turning on the microwave is the limit of my "technical" expertise, and it took me a while to get that right. The letter from "Tom" created an avalanche of mail from readers who disagreed with me. They found the voices of deceased family members comforting. I say, to each his own.

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A Note from Margo:
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!

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Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:

Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Nobody ever drowned in his own sweat."
-Ann Landers