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Dear Ann Landers,
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A Note from Margo:
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!
Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!
Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!
Shanika Stewart's Comment
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NY Mom's Comment
I moved across the country to flee a situation like this. As my daughter got older I found he would disappoint her by not showing up at all or (like "moms" deadbeat dad) he would show up with very short notice, or out of the blue and disappoint me by not calling first. Not a surprise that he never came to see her in the new state. She is 28 and understands now.
Reader Comment
My son's father was the same. I sued him for child support and let him decide when to see or not see his son. He rarely did and my son became quite equivocal about seeing him when he did come around. Later in life, when he was grown, my son and his dad developed a relationship for a short time, but his dad being who he always was, eventually, dad reverted to the selfish jerk he had always been, and my son removed him from his life altogether. He has never looked back.
YOLO 's Comment
This is more about YOU than your daughter or her father.
Quit contacting him, if he wants to see her, he knows how to contact you.
File for child support, and continue your education so you don't have to depend on that child support to raise her and most of all, learn that you should make better choices in the future and know a guy better when you lay down with him...if in the future when he grows up and wants to try a relationship with her... don't get in the way of it...and never speak poorly of him in front of her or behind her back... let her decide how she feels about him.. when she is old enough to make that decision. Otherwise it will later come back to bite you. If he says he will be there and is more than 30 mins late without calling you, leave for the day and teach him that you won't sit and wait for his beck and call... that if he is late he can call and say so..otherwise he misses the chance to spend time with her..and keep a journal of the times and dates he calls, visits and such.. later on he may try to sue for full custody of her and he being unreliable and you having documentation of it, may help your case.
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