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Dear Ann Landers,
ast Sunday our family drove over one hundred miles to visit my brother, his wife, and their newborn son. Midway through dinner, my sister-in-law left the table to take care of her infant. When we finished the meal, she called for us to come and say good-bye. I almost fainted when I saw she was breast-feeding her baby. Since then, our children, who are eleven, nine, seven, and five years of age, have been bothering me with questions about sex. I am furious with my sister-in-law for placing me in this embarrassing position. I hadn't figured on mentioning sex to my children until they were older. This stupid woman knew we were leaving for home right after dinner. Why couldn't she have waited an-other thirty minutes to nurse her baby? I'd like to take this matter up with her, but I don't know what to say. Will you please lambaste her for rudely leaving the table and behaving in this repulsive manner in front of my children?-Disgusted

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, Clark, shinnied up the rear of our toilet tank onto our bathroom counter-his favorite roosting spot when we are in or near the bedroom. While putting the groceries away, I was distracted. When I returned to collect Clark, I discovered him-stiff, wet and shivering-floating on his side in the toilet bowl. He was glassy-eyed and appeared to be suffering from severe exhaustion. Clark has one clipped wing and only one foot with a full quotient of toes, so he doesn’t balance very well under the best of conditions. My husband and I rushed Clark to the animal clinic for emergency anti-stress drugs and oxygen. He stayed overnight in the incubator and recovered sufficiently so that we were permitted to take him home the following afternoon. From now on, you can be sure the toilet seat lid will remain closed in our house. -Learned the Hard Way in Miami

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"Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good."
-Ann Landers