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Dear Ann Landers,
Speech patterns can mean something or nothing. Often they are established out of habit. If it bugs you to be called "the wife," speak up, first privately, then pub-licly. But in a nice way. Example: "Please,

dear I’m YOUR wife. Have you forgotten so soon?” dear ann,
I just read the letter from the lady who complained because her husband always introduced her as "THE wife" instead of "My wife." Some people don't know when they're well off. My husband never introduces me at all, just lets me stand there like a cigar-store Indian. Print this, please. He reads you daily, mrs. invisible dear MRS.: Here it is. Let me know if it helped. 'incumbent wife'



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Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!

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Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other."
-Ann Landers