Dear Ann Landers,
at is killing our marriage. When D. and I walked down the aisle, he was only a few pounds overweight. I pledged to quit smoking if he would promise to slim down. I have not touched a cigarette since our wedding day. D. has gained 50 pounds. He is a great guy. We enjoy each other, our children and our lives. But those mounds of fat are coming between us. He doesn't understand why our sex life isn't what it used to be. I try, but I'm turned off by those rolls of fat around his middle. Even his kisses leave me cold because his jowls are flabby. I decided a long time ago not to nag since I don't want to hurt him. I fix proper meals and keep no fattening snacks around the house, but I can't padlock his mouth when he walks out the door. Please help me, Ann. -Lovely Man but Too Much of Him

Dear Lovely,
You are wise not to nag. It won't help. Your husband knows he needs to lose weight and probably hates what he has done to himself, but the man has a problem. Your best bet is his doctor. When did your husband last have a checkup? This you can nag him about. It won't hurt his vanity. Make the appointment, and enlist the doctor's help. You'll get it. Obesity is hard on the heart and is one of the major contributing factors to high blood pressure. Tip the doctor off to sug-gest Weight Watchers or Overeaters Anonymous. Both are excellent, and they're in the phone book. Good luck to you.