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Dear Ann Landers,
ecently, you printed a letter from a woman whose husband had moved out, bag and baggage, when she wasn't home. Welcome to the club. After 30 years of what I thought was a pretty good marriage, my husband vanished. He didn't leave a note. What he left was unbelievable chaos and a wife who didn't know what hit her. Of course, there was another woman, and she went with him. Before he left (with all my good jewelry), he emptied our bank account. I had exactly $300 in the sugar bowl. Unknown to me, our $600,000 house was listed in his girlfriend's name. Due to a huge error on my attorney's part, there was nothing I could do about it. My husband's $100,000 bonus from work was deferred until after the divorce. I was ordered by the court to pay $10,000 to "equalize" the divorce when he had thousands hidden away. I had no money for "asset searching" and didn't know where to look. It was an incredible mess, and I paid a big price for my ignorance. Within a year, my ex-husband died unexpectedly. His wife got it all. Our children got nothing. She immediately sold the home and promptly disappeared. This is what can happen when a wife is a world-class dumbbell and a trusting moron with a brainless lawyer who may have been in cahoots with her husband's girlfriend. I hope every wife who reads this will learn something from what I have written. I sure wish I had read such a letter a few years ago.

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Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:


Dear Readers,
, or you must talk to a lot of kids because you really have the word. Just to keep you posted, I am sending a copy of a question-naire that has been floating around our high school. Nobody knows for sure where this thing got started, but the kids in my crowd, both guys and dolls, think it’s pretty good. I would like your opinion of this questionnaire, and I know you will level. Please don’t suggest I take it home and get my mother’s views. If she saw it, she would faint, and we’d have to call the doctor. Here it is: Know Thyself Questionnaire (Score the number indicated for each “yes” answer) Ever gone out with a member of the opposite sex? 4 Ever been kissed? 4 Ever been French kissed? 4 Ever been kissed while in a reclining position? 5 Ever gotten or given a hickey? 3 Ever been kissed in your pajamas? 2 Ever been kissed against your will? 2 Ever parked for more than an hour? 5 Ever said, “I love you”? 3 Ever said, “I love you” to more than one person? 3 Ever gone steady? 4 Ever been picked up by a person you never saw before? 7 Ever played strip poker with a member of the opposite sex? 5 Have you gone all the way? 10 Have you had the desire to go all the way but managed to keep from it? 2 Have you ever made a member of the opposite sex cry? 4 Has a member of the opposite sex ever made you cry? 4 Do you smoke? 2 Do you drink? 2 Ever passed out from drinking? 6 Ever lied to your folks about where you went or with whom? 8 Ever smoke pot? 7 Ever taken an LSD trip? 10 Ever consider the pregnancy route so your folks would SCORE CHART or under to 15 15 to 25 25 to 35 35 to 45 45 to 55 have to let you get married? 10 Queer or something Pure as the driven snow Passionate but prudish Normal and decent Indecent Headed for serious trouble 55 to 60 In terrible shape 60 or over Condemned Signed-Normal and Decent

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"At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other."
-Ann Landers