Dear Ann Landers, I would like to respond to the woman in Pittsburgh who misses the companionship of marriage, and wants to find a "nice man" now that her husband has been dead for several years. Here is a list of things NOT to do.
Do not wear your wedding ring when you go out in public. It will scare the good ones off, and the bums will hit on you, anyway.
Do not tell your date you have had enough sex and that you are not interested in more. It's a turn-off, and you could change your mind later.
Do not continue to support your 35-year-old son who lives with you. You are "enabling" him. Kick him out.
Do not tell your date that your dead husband was a saint. It's amazing how death improves people.
Do not expect him to pay for everything. These are the '90s, and you are not 21 anymore.
Do not sit at home and gain 50 pounds. Get out, and go to places where intelligent people gather. There are some good men out there who are lonely. Make the effort, and you will find them. -- Experienced in Florida
Dear Florida, Thanks for that sensible advice. I hope they listen.
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!
Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!
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Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:
Dear Readers, , adopted chil-dren, unwed mothers who gave up their babies and even unwed fa-thers. But you have never printed a letter from a white couple who has adopted a child from a minority race. My husband and I plan to adopt a biracial child, and we are running into unbelievable opposition. Both his parents and mine are against it. Many of our friends say we are crazy and that we are looking for trou-ble. Frankly, we have given up trying to explain. They refuse to listen. Please tell me, Ann, are we foolish to want to give our love to an in-nocent child who starts out in life with two strikes against him? These little ones of mixed parentage are not wanted by most people. They are, in a very real sense, handicapped. We want the challenge. We feel we are equal to it. Will you give us a word of encouragement, please?
