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Dear Ann Landers,
hen I read your articles against smoking I just shake my head and say, "Isn't it a shame there are so many gutless wonders in the world?" People will fight with each other at the drop of an adjective, but they can't stand up to a four-inch cigarette. I smoked heavily for twenty-one years. When I decided to quit here's how I did it. I carried a pack of cigarettes in my pocket. Whenever I got the urge to smoke, I reached into my pocket and asked, "Who's boss-you or me?" Then I'd answer, "I am," and jam the pack back into my pocket. After three weeks, I kicked the habit for good. Either you're boss or you're not. You wouldn't let another person push you around, would you? So why let a lousy cigarette rule your life? You don't need pills, a hypnotist, clubs, pacifiers, or any of that junk, all you need is to really want to quit smoking, one who did it

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Dear Readers,
, but I accidentally left my ukulele on a chair in the living room. Well, this fat aunt goes and sits right down on my uke and smashes it to smithereens. She didn’t say one word about buying me a new uke. All she could talk about was how kids today don’t take care of their things and how the crashing sound of that uke almost gave her heart failure. I think it was mighty cheap of my aunt not to offer to buy me a new uke. She could buy me a whole store full of ukes and not miss the money.-Former Owner Of A Ukulele

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"Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and repeat to yourself, the most comforting words of all; this, too, shall pass."
-Ann Landers