Dear Ann Landers,
"Marty's mother died. Would you pitch in fifty cents for flowers?" Or, "Sara is getting married on Saturday. Would you care to give a dollar toward a wedding gift?" Or, "Hank is in the hospital. We are sending him a couple of books." I have never said No. Two weeks ago tragedy struck a member of my family. My co-workers did not send flowers, or even a card. Should I turn the other cheek? Or should I in-form the secretary who is in charge of collections that I am fed up?-Put Out

Dear Put Out,
You don't tell me whether the relative was a parent, a sister, a brother, a grandmother, or a cousin. The relationship could make a difference. Then, too, perhaps the secretary did not know of your loss. If I were you, I'd say nothing. Consider all the possibilities and continue to give, if and when you wish.