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Section: relationships, manners
 
 

Dear Ann Landers,
I just read the letter from "Hey You" in Florida, whose mother-in-law wouldn't call her by name. My own daughter has not called me "Mom" or anything else since she married 38 years ago, when she was 18. I have never heard her say she is sorry when she has been in the wrong. Nor does she ever say, "Please," or "Thank you." This is not the way she was raised. We see each other often, and she is not hostile. Can you explain this? -- Hey, You in California

Dear Hey, You,
No, I cannot explain it. Sounds as if your daughter is angry about the way her life turned out and is just plain bitter. Why don't you ask her why she never calls you "Mom"? Tell her you would like that. It could be the beginning of a meaningful and long-overdue dialogue.



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A Note from Margo:
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!

Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!

Reader Comment
My brothers and I call our mother by her first name for the past 60 years brushed has been a terrible mother so I can identify with the writer

Reader Comment
When my dear FIL was alive, I would look in his direction and say "Ummm" to get his attention. He had the same first name as my husband so I couldn't call him Joe, and I already had a father so I couldn't call him dad.
 
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Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don't recognize them."
-Ann Landers