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Section: relationships, manners

Dear Ann Landers,
I belong to an informal dinner club that meets once a month for dinner in one of our homes. One of the women has appointed herself "social director" and is making our lives miserable. "Irene" phones everyone to remind them of the upcoming dinner plans, which is fine. The problem is that she always tells the hostess what to serve. She does not have food allergies or any medical problems; she just likes certain things. Irene eats enough for two people, so making an extra dish for her is a major annoyance. The rest of us in the group do not want to disband, and Irene would be terribly hurt if we excluded her. Any suggestions? -- Too Much Cooking in Alabama

Dear T.M.C.,
Since the major problem seems to be that Irene is too managerial, simply ignore her suggestions about what to serve. You do not owe her special privileges, or quadruple helpings. Treat her cordially, and make sure all the members have their first helping before Irene has her second -- and third.

Tags: food

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A Note from Margo:
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!

Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!

Jean's Comment
, I would call a meeting with the club and indicate that it's a new year and we're going to do things a little differently whoever holds the dinner will be responsible for selecting a menu and also whatever activities we will be doing for the remainder of the evening this way you don't have to say anything to her but you do it as if it's a group decision everyone should be happy and if they don't then oh well

Sheryl's Comment
I live and am married to a nympho. We have been together since 2008 and got married in 2011. We are both 57 years old now. I don't want sex anymore. I love him but I don't have the desire anymore. Any suggestions. Female, O'Brien
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"Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good."
-Ann Landers