Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:

Dear Readers,
, Inc., Englewood Cliffs, N.J. by the same author Since You Ask Me for my granddaughter, Abra Coleman, who will be a teen-ager in about twelve and a half years Ann Landers Talks to Teen-Agers about Sex, by Ann Landers © 1963 by Prentice-Hall, Inc., Englewood Cliffs, N. J. Copyright under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book, or any portions thereof, in any form, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review. Fifth Printing, April, 1964 Printed in the United States of America Library of Congress Catalog Card Number: 63-19915 T 03770 Acknowledgments Perhaps I should be ashamed of myself for not cul-tivating new friends on whom to impose when I under-took to write this book. But who needs new friends when old ones are so durable? One thing is certain: No writer, living or dead, ever made more unreasonable demands on busy friends and colleagues-and made them twice. The loyal little band who gave so generously in be-half of my first book Since You Ask Me came through again. My warm thanks to the best newspaper pub-lisher a girl ever had-Marshall Field, Jr., for provid-ing me daily with an ideal showcase, The Chicago Sun- Times. This remarkable newspaper has given me in-comparable exposure plus tender, loving care for eight incredible years. I can’t begin to express adequately my gratitude to Larry Fanning, Executive Editor of The Chicago Daily News, who until the fall of 1962 was Executive Editor of my parent paper, the Sun-Times. Larry found time not only to produce a newspaper worthy of a Pulitzer Prize but he also continues to edit every word published by Ann Landers. Anyone who benefits from this book is indebted to Larry both for what is in it and what is not in it. This gifted Irishman, with his solid judgment and his unerring instinct for the right word, bevels and polishes until what is left is the best of both of us. Will Munnecke, Vice-President and General Man-ager of The Chicago Sun-Times and The Chicago Daily News read the manuscript and jotted down cogent suggestions in illegible handwriting. The Old Grey Fox, with his keen perception, wisdom and un-common common sense, makes a vital contribution to everything he touches, including this book. I am deeply obligated to Dick Trezevant, Manag-ing Editor of The Chicago Sun-Times for his cool (and sometimes cold) judgments and his forthright criticism. A keen sense of editorial balance makes him an A-l sounding board. To Dr. Robert Stolar, Clinical Associate Professor of Medicine, Georgetown University, Washington, D.C., a million long-distance thanks. That’s precisely how he listened to this book-one chapter at a time. I am forever indebted to Dr. Stolar for his insistence that I tackle all the problems which disturb teen-agers. This eminent dermatologist has assured me that what appears between these covers is medically correct. My affectionate thanks to my nine terrific assistants who kept the ship on an even keel while the book was being written. A 21-gun salute to my principal as-sistant, Lilyan Simmons for her quiet competence and her staunch Scottish loyalty. To Jules, my ever-lovin’ husband, a pat on his kind, bright head for his saintly patience. After 24 years with this lovely man I am still awed by his beautiful disposition and his mysterious good humor. A low bow to our daughter Margo Coleman, now a wife and mother, for her assurance that in this book I am not talking down to, or up to, but rather with American teen-agers. Three minutes of silence while I face Pleasantville, New York and pay homage to Hobart Lewis, Execu-tive Editor and Vice-President of Reader’s Digest. Hobe responded heroically to my cry for help-and gave a title to this book on the telephone, in 30 sec-onds flat. And finally, a word of appreciation to Publishers Newspaper Syndicate and its able president, Harold Anderson, for magnificent efforts in behalf of my daily column. Harold and his colleagues have provided me with a unique opportunity to help millions of people all over the world and I shall be ever grateful for their support. Contents Since You Ask Me Again ix one two three four five six seven eight nine ten On Cloud 9 or Behind the 8-Ball 1 What about Going Steady 8 How to Break Up with a Steady 21 Why Not Go all the Way? 27 How to Help Yourself Stay Out of Trouble 40 Booze and You 50 VD Is Not an Adult’s Disease 65 What You Should Know about Homosexuality Is It Sex or the Real Thing? 93 From You to Me 108 Since You Ask Me Again Dear Ann: You flatter me by your request for a Preface to Teen-Agers and Sex, your second book. No one ever asked me to write two prefaces in a row, but then again no one ever asked me to write one preface either, and anyway, this is the first time you have written two books. A Preface should explain the purpose, method, or importance of a book, but I have no intention of even attempting to explain the purpose, method, or im-portance of either teen-agers or sex. You undertake those explanations in your book with greater skill, in-terest, and authority than I could bring to bear on either subject. I am, however, a leading authority on the purpose, method, and importance of Ann Landers and address myself to that subject with delight. Who’s Who describes you accurately, though un-imaginatively, as: Landers, Ann (Mrs. Jules Lederer), Columnist; b. Sioux City, la., July 4, 1918; d. Abraham B. and Rebecca (Rushall) Friedman; student Morningside Coll., 1936-39; m. Jules W. Lederer, July 2, 1939; 1 dau., Margo. Syndicated columnist Sun-Times Syndicate-Field Enterprises, Chgo., 1955-. Chmn. Eau Claire (Wis.) Gray-Lady Corps. A.R.C., 1947- 53; chmn. Minn.-Wis. council Anti-Defamation League, 1945-49; asst. Wis. chmn. Nat. Found. In-fantile Paralysis, 1951-53. County chmn. Democratic Party of Eau Claire. Mem. League Women Voters, Brandeis U. Women. Office: Chicago Sun-Times, Chgo. 6. While the above is incontestably correct, your read-ers should know that Jules is, if possible, an even more successful businessman than two years ago when your first book, Since You Ask Me, was published. Your daughter Margo is now the wife of John Coleman, who is emulating his father-in-law in the matter of success. And Margo and John have a daughter, Abra, who will succeed Margo as Ann Landers after Margo has succeeded her mother in that role. After all, every dynasty must have a beginning. As to your purpose, it is direct and clear-to help any person make the most of himself in every way and at all times. As to your method, it is very simple, yet extremely difficult. You work harder and longer than any one I know, and harder and longer than you ever ask of others. You demand the best advice from experts in every field. You translate the advice of those experts, after seasoning it liberally with your own knowledge and common sense, into direct, moving, persuading sentences and paragraphs. In brief, you communicate with your readers with an effectiveness few match and none exceed. But purpose and method are relatively easy to de-scribe. The question and the description of your im-portance, however, almost call for a “