Dear Ann Landers, I am in my late 70s, and my wife is a few years younger than I am. She is neat about herself, keeps the house clean, keeps my shirts washed and ironed, and is a great cook. So what's the problem? Why at my age am I writing to Ann Landers? Here is my dilemma:
Whenever I try to tell a story, my wife interrupts me and proceeds to give her version, leaving me dangling in mid-sentence. When I try to continue, I do so at the risk of starting an argument, which embarrasses everybody. This happens whether we are dining with friends or at home, just the two of us.
Our children rarely visit anymore and have told me privately it is because they cannot bear to hear their mother belittle me. I'm sure it doesn't help that she also tells them what they should eat and how much.
We have been married for longer than 50 years. My wife normally has a few martinis before dinner and then wine with her meal. I have no illusions about her changing her ways, but I hope you might have a suggestion or two to help me cope with the situation. No name or city, please, just - Diminished in California
Dear California, You have been married to this woman for more than 50 years, so by now, you should know she is strong-willed and domineering, and as you said, she is not going to change.
You can, however, refuse to let her horn in when you are talking. Simply say, "Please let me tell it my way, and if you want to give your version later, fine," and keep on talking.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT relinquish the floor. Keep on talking. (P.S. The martinis and wine don't help the situation. How about shortening the "cocktail" time? I suspect part of her excessive gabbiness is because of the fact that she is half shnockered.)
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!
Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!
Reader Comment
If limiting the old bitch's alcohol doesn't work, try a good amount of duct tape around her mouth! After over 50 years of her abuse, it's time to turn the tables on her. LOL (p.s. I am a woman)
Reader Comment
I totally agree with the "Reader Comment" above; I also am a woman. It sounds like something I would write. Get the Duct tape ready, sweetheart and shorten the booze!
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Dear Readers, , 1974. There, for all the world to see, was the advice goddess (literally in the flesh) luxuriating in a marble bathtub with nothing between her and all those bulging eyes but a zillion blue and pink bubbles. How did you find the nerve, Ann? Were you really naked? Was the photographer a female? What reaction did you get from the public? Did you receive many complaints? Dare you print this letter and re-spond to my questions? -Sightly Square in Newark Dear Slightly: That color photo by Elliott Erwitt on the cover of The New York Times Magazine section created quite a sensation. I was wearing a strapless bathing suit and used three bottles of bub-ble bath. The first reaction was from Clifton Wharton Jr., then presi-dent of Michigan State University in East Lansing, and his lovely wife, Delores. They thought the photo was smashing. My readers, family and friends were delighted, not only with the photo but the splendid interview by the late Judy Wax. The only neg-ative comment came from Father Ted Hesburgh, president of the Uni-versity of Notre Dame. My friend, the Reverend, considered it “out of character and inappropriate, but not indecent.” Once in a great while, something truly momentous happens in my life and I feel I must share it with you, my readers. You have been my loyal friends for forty years. The IIesi in Ah Laniieiis Here are a few of the special columns where my personal and public life came together:
