Dear Ann Landers, should have written this letter several weeks ago, but like everyone else, I keep putting things off. Thousands of children will be depressed on Valentine's Day. While teachers spend time putting up lovely mailboxes and heart-shaped dec-orations, little emphasis will be placed on love and kindness. There will be so many disappointed children again this year. The same pretty girls and handsome boys (always popular) will receive a load of valentines, while the plain Janes and Johnnies will be left out. I am opposed to free choice when it comes to exchanging valentines in school. It creates too much anxiety and heartache. The teacher ought to match up valentine "couples." They should make valentines for each other during class time. No other valentines should be given at school. This way, no one will be left out. It's the best way to save hurt feelings. My own child is pretty and popular. She told me in January she hates Valentine's Day because "the same kids get dozens while other kids get none." She gave a valentine last year to every kid in the class. I thought it was a kind and generous thing to do. It made me proud of her. If my letter arrives too late for this year, maybe you can print it and plans can be made for next year. Thanks for your time. -Mother in Dothan, Ala.
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!
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Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:
Dear Readers, , my parents popped in just as my husband and I finished lunch. It was one of those rare occasions when my husband had offered to do the dishes. I was shocked when my mother asked, 'Why is HE doing the dishes?' My mother has always been very traditional when it comes to women's roles, and her disapproving remark annoyed me. Wishing to avoid a confrontation, I simply did not respond.
What I SHOULD have said was 'Maybe because this is the '90s and I work, too.' I could have added, 'Maybe because I spackled and sanded and painted all the bedroom walls. Maybe because I ripped up the carpet on the stairs, pulled nails and repainted the stairway. Maybe because I go to his shop and do sanding for him while he builds kitchens for a living. Maybe because I helped him put a new floor in the upstairs bathroom. Maybe because I help him unload wood from his pickup truck. Maybe because I'm usually the one who hauls two large garbage cans filled with trash down the road to be collected. Maybe because I'm constantly picking up after him, cooking his meals and doing his laundry. Maybe because we do things for each other and I shouldn't be made to feel guilty if he does the dishes once in a while.'
I'd love to write more, Ann, but I've got to mop the kitchen floor and start preparing Sunday's dinner. HIS family is coming over. If my mother reads this, I've got another shocker for her. He cooks, too. And now, if I could only get him to sew. -- Doing It All in Binghamton, N.Y.
