, Advice by Ann Landers - []
Section: behavior, health-and-wellness, manners, relationships

Dear Margo,
Wonder if you could advise me:I had a falling out with a friend of 30 years. I am feeling betrayed by another friend. This friend secretly plans outings with the friend of 30 years. She feels the need to hide from me that she sees this friend of mine. This friend (the one I feel is betraying me) never knew the other woman until I introduced them to each other. Can you explain this to me? I feel hurt, even mad. - Catty

Dear Catty,
You seem to be forgetting what you wrote, and what I believe to be the key to your problem: you and your longtime friend had a falling out. This means you are no longer close. I don't think they are "secretly planning outings;" they are just not including you because ... the two of you had a falling out. Your feelings of betrayal are misplaced because it is a fact of life that some people, when they are introduced, hit it off. It is a bit grade school-ish to think, "Well, I introduced them, so they should include me." I hope you can rethink the situation in a more mature way.
- Margo

Tags: margo

Share this Column with Friends

What do you think?

A Note from Margo:
Hi! It's Margo here. I'd love to know what you think of the letters -- and the answers!

Also, any additional thoughts you might have. Thanks!

Reader Comment
Good answer.

Reader Comment
Great response to Catty

Debra's Comment
Great answer to Catty!
Please share your comments below:

Our Reader to Reader Question of the Week:

Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

Tell us what you think?

Popular Columns

Tag Cloud

Ask a Question
Post a Comment

"At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other."
-Ann Landers