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Dear Ann Landers,
ow does a person know if he is depressed? I realize it isn't possible to be happy all the time, yet I fear my bout with "the blahs" or "the blues" is more intense than what the average per-son experiences. Please describe the symptoms of depression so I can have a better understanding of what goes on with me. I feel isolated and inadequate. -OK Today but Worried About Tomorrow

Dear Worried,
Millions of Americans suffer from severe depres-sion, according to the National Institute of Mental Health, so if you are severely depressed, you are not alone. Dr. John Kane, who heads the depression clinic at the Long Island Jewish Hillside Medical Center, listed the common warning signals of severe depression in an interview with Olive Evans of The New York Times. Here they are: Feelings of sadness and hopelessness ("I will never be better"). Loss of the "pleasure capacity," the ability to enjoy anything. Loss of interest in sex. Loss of appetite (or overeating). Insomnia (or sleeping too much). Anxious or restless behavior (or apathy). Difficulty in concentration, remembering things and making deci-sions. Becoming upset by small things. Feelings of worthlessness ("I'm no good"). 10. Withdrawal from friends and relatives. If you see yourself in six or more of the above, you are probably se-verely depressed. I urge you to take this column to your physician and talk to him about your depression. Ask him to recommend a counselor. If you cannot afford a private therapist, check the phone book under "mental health clinics." There are many excellent government-funded clinics that cost very little. Moreover, you've already paid for them through your taxes, so go.



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, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other."
-Ann Landers