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Is it adultery if a married man goes out once a week with a woman who is also married and whose husband works nights?

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From Ann's Archives: 1955 to 2002
Dear Ann Landers,
Is it adultery if a married man goes out once a week with a woman who is also married and whose husband works nights? My husband swears no sex is involved. According to him, adultery means sex between a married person and a single person. What is your verdict?--Little Egypt
Read More In:   relationships
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Comments

  Reader Comment
Oh, good grief! Why do women tolerate this nonsense? This woman's husband is having a weekly date with someone else. She seems hung up on semantics--'Is this adultery?' If it isn't already adultery, it soon will be. If the actual act has not taken place, adultery can also be committed in the heart. She needs to give a clear ultimatum: 'Either this ends now, or you pack your bags and leave.'

  Janice's Comment
Insecure people do not allow their spouses/partners to be friends with persons of the opposite sex. Secure people allow it. I am female, my best friend is male, and there is no sex involved and no sex desired by either of us. If this letter writer is not secure enough to allow her husband his friendship with a female, she should work on becoming secure enough. Controlling insecurity is never attractive and will never benefit her marriage. I don't think it was called for to put the word sexless within quotation marks, implying that the husband is lying. Nor was it appropriate to assume that the other husband doesn't know about his wife's friendship and would be enraged if he did. Pertaining to a reader comment, every, but every, married person has committed 'adultery in the heart', and it's insane to object to or to try to police such thoughts.

  Diana's Comment
Has your husband told you that you may not join them on this weekly dinner date and enjoy some conversation, wine, and food; if he has said you can’t join in whenever you want to, then there’s a problem. Why is your husband depriving you of possibly making a new friend yourself?

  Wolfen's Comment
People who allow it are foolish and deserve what they get!

  virginia's Comment
Ann landers archives may 1960 header 'she won't let him read her diary'
 
What do you think?
 



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Is it adultery if a married man goes out once a week with a woman who is also married and whose husband works nights? My husband swears no sex is involved. According to him, adultery means sex between a married person and a single person. What is your verdict?�Little Egypt
READ MORE →
Is it adultery if a married man goes out once a week with a woman who is also married and whose husband works nights? My husband swears no sex is involved. According to him, adultery means sex between a married person and a single person. What is your verdict?�Little Egypt
I think you've been out in the sun too long. "Nameless, Faceless and Placeless" discovered that her fiance, Jeremy, was online, pretending to be unattached, and looking to meet women. She planned to trap him by pretending she was one of those mystery females. Now, he wants to meet her. She asked for your advice, because she said she loves the guy and doesn't want to lose him. You told her to stop playing games. Annie, this guy is a LOSER, and you should have told her to dump him. She has been living with him for more than a year, and they are engaged to be married. He is no immature child. He is in his 40s, and so is she. Why is this jerk looking in the online personals to meet other women? Furthermore, she must have suspected he was not entirely faithful, which is why she resorted to duplicity to find out exactly what he was up to. You should have told her to get rid of the creep. The wedding ring on his finger will not keep him from straying. Better she should know NOW what kind of guy she is involved with. Please, Ann, reconsider your advice. -- No Mystery in Centereach, N.Y.
READ MORE →
I think you've been out in the sun too long. "Nameless, Faceless and Placeless" discovered that her fiance, Jeremy, was online, pretending to be unattached, and looking to meet women. She planned to trap him by pretending she was one of those mystery females. Now, he wants to meet her. She asked for your advice, because she said she loves the guy and doesn't want to lose him. You told her to stop playing games. Annie, this guy is a LOSER, and you should have told her to dump him. She has been living with him for more than a year, and they are engaged to be married. He is no immature child. He is in his 40s, and so is she. Why is this jerk looking in the online personals to meet other women? Furthermore, she must have suspected he was not entirely faithful, which is why she resorted to duplicity to find out exactly what he was up to. You should have told her to get rid of the creep. The wedding ring on his finger will not keep him from straying. Better she should know NOW what kind of guy she is involved with. Please, Ann, reconsider your advice. -- No Mystery in Centereach, N.Y.
This is one of my favorite columns. It reminds us that too many people don't take time to smell the roses. I am 84 and enjoying every day. -- Anonymous
READ MORE →
This is one of my favorite columns. It reminds us that too many people don't take time to smell the roses. I am 84 and enjoying every day. -- Anonymous
“
Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies.
- Ann Landers
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More in Children
VIEW ALL →
Is it adultery if a married man goes out once a week with a woman who is also married and whose husband works nights? My husband swears no sex is involved. According to him, adultery means sex between a married person and a single person. What is your verdict?�Little Egypt
READ MORE →
Is it adultery if a married man goes out once a week with a woman who is also married and whose husband works nights? My husband swears no sex is involved. According to him, adultery means sex between a married person and a single person. What is your verdict?�Little Egypt
I think you've been out in the sun too long. "Nameless, Faceless and Placeless" discovered that her fiance, Jeremy, was online, pretending to be unattached, and looking to meet women. She planned to trap him by pretending she was one of those mystery females. Now, he wants to meet her. She asked for your advice, because she said she loves the guy and doesn't want to lose him. You told her to stop playing games. Annie, this guy is a LOSER, and you should have told her to dump him. She has been living with him for more than a year, and they are engaged to be married. He is no immature child. He is in his 40s, and so is she. Why is this jerk looking in the online personals to meet other women? Furthermore, she must have suspected he was not entirely faithful, which is why she resorted to duplicity to find out exactly what he was up to. You should have told her to get rid of the creep. The wedding ring on his finger will not keep him from straying. Better she should know NOW what kind of guy she is involved with. Please, Ann, reconsider your advice. -- No Mystery in Centereach, N.Y.
READ MORE →
I think you've been out in the sun too long. "Nameless, Faceless and Placeless" discovered that her fiance, Jeremy, was online, pretending to be unattached, and looking to meet women. She planned to trap him by pretending she was one of those mystery females. Now, he wants to meet her. She asked for your advice, because she said she loves the guy and doesn't want to lose him. You told her to stop playing games. Annie, this guy is a LOSER, and you should have told her to dump him. She has been living with him for more than a year, and they are engaged to be married. He is no immature child. He is in his 40s, and so is she. Why is this jerk looking in the online personals to meet other women? Furthermore, she must have suspected he was not entirely faithful, which is why she resorted to duplicity to find out exactly what he was up to. You should have told her to get rid of the creep. The wedding ring on his finger will not keep him from straying. Better she should know NOW what kind of guy she is involved with. Please, Ann, reconsider your advice. -- No Mystery in Centereach, N.Y.
This is one of my favorite columns. It reminds us that too many people don't take time to smell the roses. I am 84 and enjoying every day. -- Anonymous
READ MORE →
This is one of my favorite columns. It reminds us that too many people don't take time to smell the roses. I am 84 and enjoying every day. -- Anonymous

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"Ask Ann Landers" was the country's #1 advice column for 47 years. Under her pen name Ann Landers, Eppie Lederer became an American media celebrity, only rivaled in popularity by her identical twin sister Pauline Phillips, better known as Dear Abby. Her advice was printed in English-language papers all over the world. She was the best read and most widely syndicated human relations adviser during her time as Ann Landers.

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