Dear Ann Landers,
have a 5- month-old son and things are back to normal now but the first four months were a nightmare. Why? Because al- most every day four or five sets of friends and relatives came to visit. Some didn't even call first. My mother-in-law brought over a woman I barely knew. She told me how she had developed complications while nursing her baby and almost lost her breast. (A great story for a young mother just getting started.) Another woman brought her young child along and after an hour said, "I really ought to take Billy home. He had a 102 tem- perature this morning. I'm afraid he's coming down with something." In 1961 I wrote my first book. It was called Since You Ask Me. In that book, I dealt with the problems that produced the greatest number of letters. Chapter Six of that book was called, "Must We Outlaw the In-Law?" Today, many years later, in-law problems still figure prominently as one of the major causes for marital bust-ups. I am often asked, "How serious is an in-law problem? Has it been exagger-ated? Has the American mother-in-law earned her black eye or is she the in-nocent victim of gag-writers?" My mail provides daily evidence that the in-law problem is no myth. Ex-perts say in-laws figure in two out of five divorces-somewhere. Social critics insist the American matriarchy has crowded Dad so far out of the picture that he isn't important enough to make trouble. This may be more than a lame joke. My mail indicates that the mother-in-law is at least fifty times as troublesome as the father-in-law. And in most cases, it is the mother of the husband who causes the problem. The constant round of company made me nervous. The baby became cranky and my husband and I started picking at each other. We realize now we were fools to let thoughtless people do this to us. It's too late for now, but next time we'll know better. MAD IN MOR