Dear Ann Landers,
Let's blow the lid off the toilet seat debate once and for all. Equality and liberation may be the order of the day, but Western society still gets its knickers in a twist about who left the toi-let seat in what position. It's phony chivalry to suggest that men leave the commode in the appropriate configuration for the next female visitor. We know that the dainty litde hand we're sparing the trauma of a seat adjustment is the same dainty little hand that gave the bowl a vigorous scrubbing yesterday. So, if common courtesy suggests that one user prepare the facility for the next, it must also enjoin women to leave the seat tip for the next standing customer. People sharing a bathroom should sit down to-gether (perhaps in a different room, on chairs) and reach a satisfactory compromise. Maybe some entrepreneural plumber will finance his retirement with a time-delay, self-closing toilet seat that tucks itself into a stan-dard position after the user leaves the room. Or perhaps each of us could exercise a little common courtesy and close the entire lid and leave the porcelain presence looking its designer best. -Canadian Throne Thinker Dear Throne: I was staggered by the number of people who had strong opinions on bathroom etiquette and were eager to express them. Some sent photos. Keep reading: From Everett, Wash.: Our office has two unisex toilets. We resolved the problem by asking everyone to close the lid when they finish. Now the men don't feel picked on, and no one has to look into the gaping mouth of an ugly toilet. Carson City, Nev.: The best reason to close the lid is to save the life of a small child or a household pet. Every year, several babies and dozens of kittens are drowned in toilets. You should have taken this op-portunity to advise all adults to close the lid and train their youngsters to do the same. Coral Springs, Fla.: Like most females, you have been culturally brainwashed. You can bet the man who leaves the seat up is making a statement about the way he feels about women. It's not about manners, it's about control, stupid! Rational Reader, No City: When you use the bathroom, it is your responsibility to put the lid and the seat in the position that serves you best. It is not someone else's responsibility to do this for you. Real class is how you tend to your own needs, instead of carping and whining be-cause other people don't do it for you. In our house, everyone puts the seat and the lid down. It looks nice, nothing falls in, and the dog can't drink the water. Sioux Falls, S.D.: Regarding the Great Toilet-Seat Debate. There is a solution. Buy a fluffy toilet tank cover and matching seat cover. They are attractive, and the bathroom will look so much better. The bulki-ness ensures that the seat will always fall down after use. I discovered this by accident and no longer need to worry about drowning in the middle of the night. Dallas: I'm a 71-year-old male who does not spend his time writing to newspapers, but this flap about whether the toilet seat should be up or down is just nuts. I would like to know what the hell difference it makes in the first place, and in the second place, I cannot believe that I am taking the time to write this letter.

Dear Dallas,
And I cannot believe over 20,000 people did the same. I thought we were out of the bathroom and on to other topics, but the toilet- paper issue wouldn't go away. Here it is again, in 1992: