Dear Ann Landers, Not long ago, I read several letters in your column about the danger of fires caused by lint buildup in clothes-dryer vent pipes. Since my wife religiously cleans the lint filter every time she uses the clothes dryer, I never considered that we would have a problem. After reading those columns, I tried to assure myself that everything was OK, but I was still uncomfortable and decided to disconnect the dryer and check it out, just to be safe.
Well, I was shocked beyond all reason when I removed the first section of the exhaust pipe. It was almost 100 percent full of solid lint buildup. I have no idea how any air could have passed through that clogged pipe. I ended up taking everything apart, including the motor fan, which was packed with lint, as well. I thank God your article appeared when it did, Ann, because we were sitting on top of a disaster ready to ignite and didn't know it. -- L.H., Grand Rapids, Mich.
Dear Grand Rapids, Your letter was one of at least 50 that expressed gratitude for those columns. All who wrote said they had found an extraordinary amount of lint buildup in the dryer vent pipes and vowed they would never let it happen again.
I hope those who missed those columns will pay special attention to this one. It could prevent a disaster.
Dear Ann Landers, My wife has cancer. We have been battling it for six years, and short of a major miracle, she will die from it. I am not asking for sympathy.
We are living our lives as fully as we can, and we are not shy about discussing all aspects of this battle when it comes to our children, friends and family.
Here is my problem: I find it painful when friends say to her, "Get well soon." It hurts to hear these words. They sound so phony, as if she had a broken leg. My wife will NOT get well, soon or ever, for that matter, and everybody knows it, including her. I haven't said anything about this because I know these people mean well, but it makes me want to scream every time I hear it.
These friends are important to us, and I don't want to offend them by telling them to stop saying that, so I'm hoping if you print my letter, it will help. - Granada Hills, Calif.
Dear Granada Hills, Here's your letter, but it won't help. People are going to continue to say, "Get well soon," no matter what you say, even though they, too, know your wife is terminal. Play the game. The phrase is intended to be comforting.
Dear Ann Landers, My 89-year-old father in California is partially blind and deaf, and suffers from dementia. He recently had a heart attack, followed by a stroke and then pneumonia. He is currently bedridden.
Three months ago, Dad received in the mail a renewal form for his driver's license. He was informed that he could renew it for four years -- no test involved. Would you please ask the people at the California Department of Motor Vehicles what they think they are doing? -- Outraged in Lexington, Va.
Dear Outraged, Elderly drivers should be tested before their licenses are renewed. Unfortunately, renewal by mail for all "good" drivers is the practice in many states, and it would be a public service if they would cut it out. If anyone has an idea how we can put an end to this nonsense, I would like to hear it.
Dear Ann Landers, I am a male escort working on my master's degree at a university in Washington, D.C. I take out women (usually my mother's age) and am well paid. There is no sex involved. These women simply need a decent-looking, well-dressed guy to take them to various social events at which they would feel ill at ease if not accompanied.
Very few friends know about my "moonlighting," which is the way I want it. I have met some interesting, intelligent women in my work, most of them widowed or divorced. Three of these women would like to marry me.
Marriage is out of the question. I am gay. Should I tell them? It would be easier than trying to make up reasons for my lack of interest. Yes or no, Ann? -- Mr. X in D.C.
Dear Mr. X, No. A negative response to the marriage proposals is adequate. There is no need to go into detail about your personal life. Meanwhile, don't be ashamed of your part-time job. The older women are no doubt grateful for the company. And escorting them to social events is a lot easier than cleaning office buildings at night.
Dear Ann Landers, When my sister remarried two years ago, her new husband did not want to raise her son from a previous marriage. In those two years, the boy lived with an aunt, a grandmother and an uncle. Now, he is living with me, and I plan to keep him. He is a wonderful, adorable child, and I love him.
The problem is, his mother gets government benefits for this boy. She won't give up the welfare check and refuses to give me some of the money to compensate for raising him. She also claims him as a deduction on her income taxes, yet she is not supporting him at all.
Should I just forget about the money and consider the boy my own, or should I try to convince my sister to take care of him? Your advice would be greatly appreciated. -- Ticked Off in Texas
Dear Ticked, You say your sister's son is "a wonderful, adorable child" and you love him. His own mother doesn't want him, and you don't know what to do? Forget about his mother's chiseling on the welfare checks. Keep the boy, and consider him a blessing in your life. And please be aware that you are a blessing in that child's life, as well. If he doesn't know it now, he will later.
