Dear Ann Landers,
Bob's mother is very ill, and I'm afraid a divorce would kill her. What should I do, Ann? I feel torn and trapped. I am in desperate need of advice.

Dear Pennsylvania,
Put everything on hold until Bob's mother is well or, heaven forbid, no longer with us. Tell Bob he must go to Alcoholics Anonymous, or the marriage is over. Be firm about this, unless you are willing to be married to a drunk who is sure to get worse. Stop seeing Max until you give Bob a chance to dry up. If Max really cares about you, he will leave you alone and be willing to let you give your marriage a chance to make it. You have a lot on your plate, lady, and I hope you are equal to the challenges that lie ahead.