Dear Ann Landers,
Having read your column for the past 40 years, I feel as if I know you as a friend. I am sending an item that appeared in the California Retired Teachers Association newsletter. The author is unknown. I hope you will think it's funny enough to share. -- David H., La Crescenta, Calif.

Dear David,
I do, and I shall. Thank you. Here it is: "Why Worry?" There are only two things to worry about -- Either you are well, or you are sick. If you are well, then there is nothing to worry about. But if you are sick, there are two things to worry about -- Either you will get well, or you will die. If you get well, then there is nothing to worry about. But if you die, there are only two things to worry about. Either you go to heaven or to hell. If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about. If you go to hell, you'll be so darn busy shaking hands with old friends, You won't have time to worry.