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Dear Ann Landers,
hen I was first married, I used to clear my throat to get the attention of my in-laws. I didn't want to call them Mom and Dad, or Mother and Father, and I wouldn't have dared to call them by their first names. When I did use "Mom" and "Dad," I was very uncomfortable, even though I liked them both a great deal. But they were not my parents, and I kept searching (without success) for a name that would identify them properly and show love as well. Now, we have a son-in-law who calls my husband and me by our first names and another son-in-law who calls us "Mr. and Mrs." We are not happy with either. The first is too chummy, and the second is too formal. ANN LANDERS Every in-law we have talked to feels as we do except a few people who don't mind being called by their first names. Do you have a solu-tion to this age-old dilemma? -Nameless and Placeless

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, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good."
-Ann Landers