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Dear Ann Landers,
his is in response to "Ceiling Zero," the Pennsylvania woman who did not want to sleep in the same bed with her husband, so she moved into the guest room. (He had told her that if she was in his bed, she should know "what to expect.") ANN IA\\ III 15 S My husband and I have no problem with sexual incompatibility, but we do have a mutually satisfactory sleeping arrangement that Pennsyl-vania might consider. For the first few years of our marriage, I slept without covers on 17 inches of a 54-inch double bed. My husband was a restless sleeper and sprawled horizontally across the bed and hogged the blankets. My solution was to redecorate. I bought two twin beds. They each have their own covers, are made up separately and then pushed to-gether. With one bedspread, it looks like a king-size bed. Now, after almost 50 years of marriage, we both like our sleeping arrangement and nobody feels exploited. Pennsylvania and her hus-band seem to be thoroughly confused about sex, sleep, night and bed- things that are not necessarily related. A sexual act can take place on the kitchen floor or under the dining room table as well as in a number of other locations in the house. It can occur during the day or night. Sleep, however, generally occurs in bed and usually at night. Your advice to seek counseling is right on target. Sign me -Sleeping Beautifully in California

Dear Sleeping Beauty,
If all the women who wrote to complain about their marital sleeping arrangements were laid end to end, they would be much more comfortable. Twin beds pushed together, as you described, is the ideal solution for couples who want to be close, but not all night every night.



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, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good."
-Ann Landers