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Dear Ann Landers,
There is nothing sadder than a childless couple. It's heartbreaking to see them stretched out, relaxing around the swimming pool, sun-tanned WAKE Ul1 AINU SMELL THE CIIFFEE! N9 and miserable, trotting off to Europe like lonesome fools. What an empty life! Nothing but money to spend and time to enjoy it! They miss all the fun of doing without for the children's sake. How selfish they become, buying what they want and doing as they please. Everyone should have children. No one should be allowed to escape the rewarding experiences that accompany every stage of parenthood. Those all-night vigils, the coughing spells, drunken babysitters, saturated mattresses, midnight rushes to the hospital, separating little brothers and sisters when they try to kill each other. I pity the couple without children to brighten the cocktail hour. The little darlings have a way of brushing a martini from your hand and mas-saging the potato chips into the rugs. And what fun when they fight you for the olive! The little scuffles in the presence of guests make for a well- rounded life. And an early breakdown. The real satisfaction comes later. Those thoughtful discussions when the report card reveals your prodigy is one step below a nitwit. Then the hours of arguing. You try to pin it on his side of the family. He tries to pin it on your side of the family. But children are worth it all. The warm feeling the first time you took the boy hunting. He didn't mean to shoot you in the leg. Remember how he cried? He was so disappointed that you weren't a deer. The limp is with you to this day. Nothing builds character like practicing self-control. And what bet-ter practice than watching the warm smile of a lad with the sun glitter-ing on $500 worth of dental braces-ruined by peanut brittle. The childless couple lives in a vacuum. They try to fill the lonesome hours with golf, bridge, trips, civic affairs. Sometimes the tranquility and extra money is enough to drive you crazy! All you have to do is look at these empty, unfulfilled shells to see what the years have done to them. He looks boyish, unlined, rested. She is slim, well-groomed and youthful. It isn't natural. If they had kids like the rest of us, they'd be beat-up, gray, wrinkled and nervous wrecks, too. -San Francisco

Dear Friends,
Many thanks for sending on what will be a yuk for some and a yawn for others. I could write a 10-page rebuttal, but I won't. I can't refrain from one comment, however. Those "cocktail hours" enjoyed by childless couples age them a lot faster than half-a- dozen kids. I 4 II ANN L A Ml IIIS Here's a column I wrote to help those parents who have tried their best and need words of encouragement. It's one of my most-requested pieces:



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Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Sensual pleasures have the fleeting brilliance of a comet; a happy marriage has the tranquillity of a lovely sunset."
-Ann Landers