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Dear Ann Landers,
am married to a kind, considerate, thought-ful man. It's the second marriage for both "Ben" and me. We are in our 50s. Ben's children are in their 20s. He has given them cars and paid their golf fees, and he continues to hand over spending money and buy them luxuries. Nobody works. They are all in college (for which their father pays, of course). When I point out that his kids are taking advantage of him, Ben be-comes sullen and uncommunicative. Our marriage would be perfect if it weren't for this problem. What should I do? -Clear View

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Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Sensual pleasures have the fleeting brilliance of a comet; a happy marriage has the tranquillity of a lovely sunset."
-Ann Landers