Dear Ann Landers,
am married to a kind, considerate, thought-ful man. It's the second marriage for both "Ben" and me. We are in our 50s. Ben's children are in their 20s. He has given them cars and paid their golf fees, and he continues to hand over spending money and buy them luxuries. Nobody works. They are all in college (for which their father pays, of course). When I point out that his kids are taking advantage of him, Ben be-comes sullen and uncommunicative. Our marriage would be perfect if it weren't for this problem. What should I do? -Clear View

Dear Clear,
Lay off. Your husband knows you are right, but he can't help himself. His relationship with his children was established before he met you. The principal reason for the failure of second marriages is kids. So watch it, dear, lest you become a statistic. The Best he Ann I a n ii e ii s I 2 !)