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Dear Ann Landers,
s I write this my little boy is lying on the couch under an icebag. His face is as red as a beet and the skin is bro-ken in a few places where I slapped him. When he gets stubborn or has a tantrum, I become so angry I can't control myself. I have hit him like this several times before, even though I know it is wrong. I read your column every day and have read your advice to look in the phone book under child abuse. I looked and there is nothing in this town (population 3,000). When this boy was born four years ago, I really didn't want him but my husband was crazy about children and insisted that I have a family. I have always hated this kid, which is a terrible thing for a mother to admit, but it is true. His daddy died two years ago and, thank God, I don't have any other children. I am a rotten mother. Many times I have thought of giving up the boy for adoption. I know there are many couples who would love to have him. He is very smart for his age and darling-looking. But just when I get ready to put my hand on the phone, I tell myself, "Don't do it. Keep him and learn to be a good mother." I live 1,500 miles away from my own family. I have a good job and work 50 hours a week. Please tell me what to do. -Telling It Like It Is in Kansas

Dear Telling It,
My heart aches for that little boy on the couch. And for you, too. I know the guilt must be killing you. You must get help at once. Call Parents Anonymous immediately at (909) 621-6184. They may be able to give you a local number to con-tact in your area. The morning that letter appeared in print, the phone in my office began to ring at 8:30 A.M. By noon we had received calls fi'om all over the countiy. Five phones were going at once. My secretaries lost coant of the number of callers who pleaded, "We'll take that little boy. Just tell us where he is. " One woman in Pennsylvania said, "Our children are 2 and 3, and there's another one on the way, but I can't bear to think of that little one being abused. We'll pay his airfare no matter where he is. Please send him, to us." Readers phoned their local Jiewspapers and learned where my syndicate was located. They called and asked how to contact the mother of the abused child. The mail poured in from all over the United States and Canada. Hun-dreds of readers were eager to open their hearts and their homes to the boy. I had to tell them all that the mother's letter was anonymous. She gave us no name or address, and asked that we not tty to track her down. The best I could do was beg her to contact an organization that was there to help her learn how to handle her hostility and be a better mother. But I wanted to let you know there is a staggering number of beautifrl, caring people in this world. They don't make headlines because being decent and generous and warmheaned isn't news. But it's a wonderful feeling to know they exist. A million thanks to those who offered to take that little boy. I love you all and God bless. Sometimes parents do eveiything tight, but things still go wrong:



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Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don't recognize them."
-Ann Landers