Dear Ann Landers,
ll my life, people have asked me if I'm of mixed race. Tie Best if Aik I a n n f n s / 147 At the age of 35, I'm ready to find the answer to that question. My parents separated immediately after I was born. My father in-sists that when he was away on a Navy assignment, my mother had an affair. I am deeply hurt that he does not believe I am his biological daughter. I approached my mother about this several months ago because I have many physical characteristics that are clearly biracial. She became very angry and cursed me for raising such an "insulting" question. Since that time, our relationship has been very tense. I'm afraid if I bring up the subject again, she may stop talking to me permanently. I want to end this estrangement, Ann, but I also want to know the truth. Am I blowing this out of proportion? What can I do?

Dear No Name, No City,
I contacted Illinois Masonic Hospital in Chicago, which has on-site DNA paternity testing, and this is what I learned: To get a completely accurate result, you would have to be tested, and so would your father and mother. The cost of the test is $600. It takes two to eight weeks to get the results. The test is 100 percent accurate if the man is not the father and 99.9 percent accurate if he is. If the mother is not tested, there is a 0.8 percent chance of a false positive. You are going to have to decide whether you want to risk your mother's wrath by going ahead with the testing. From what you have told me, I doubt that she would cooperate. If you decide to be tested, are you prepared for the repercussions should the tests reveal that your father's accusations were correct? I hope you will consider all the ramifications before you press hard to pursue the truth. Adoption Not flesh of my flesh Nor bone of my bone, But still miraculously my own. Never forget for a single minute, You didn't grow under my heart, But in it. ANN LAMIIE RS Adoption has become a controversial issue. Many states have changed or mod-ified their laws to allow adopted children to search for their birth parents and vice versa. Those of you who are regular readers of my column know that I am not in favor of such searches unless both the adult adopted child and the birth parents agree to be found. While medical history is important, disrupting the lives of others in order to satisfy one's curiosity can be very damaging. I am saddened by the thought that many children waiting to be adopted will languish in foster homes or state-supported orphanages because potential par-ents are afraid to risk having the child wrenched from them at a later date by the birth parents. And who can blame them?