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Dear Ann Landers,
hat wisdom, consolation or advice can you give parents in their 50s who have worked hard to achieve the Ameri-can dream, loved their kids and tried to give them the best world ever? We are also the unhappiest. Many of our children are on drugs, unemployed dropouts, mi-grants, drifters, angry with the world, hostile toward us and out of joint with society. How much and for how long should parents pay, in terms of self-recrimination, worry, disappointment and financial sup-port? How can we enjoy the years that are left to us now that we have more money and fewer business pressures and are still in fairly good health? It's heartbreaking to see our kids maladjusted, disoriented and un-able to cope. We can't help but feel we are to blame. After all, they are our sons and daughters. We raised them. Where is the cutoff line? Do you have any answers? -Meant Well Parents

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Dear Readers,
, whatever they needed I provided. What really hurt my son and I the most was the obituary - we were not mentioned at all. Our friends (mine and hers) were appalled. I was embarrassed and upset for not just me, but for my son-who loved her also. I never been so upset. Her x-husband put his wife and kids and their grandchildren in the obituary, who my girlfriend barely knew. They live an hour away from us. I know its silly to be mad over a little section of the newspaper, but it still hurts. Will time let this devastating loss of her and this article ever go away? I am so angry at this whole situation, its not like we can go and rewrite an obituary notice.

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"Keep in mind that the true measure of an individual is how he treats a person who can do him absolutely no good."
-Ann Landers