AnnLanders.com - Advice for your Everyday Life
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Dear Ann Landers,
You told "Spokane" her dad "may be a few bricks short of a load" because he finally confided to her that he was not her biological father. Then, you printed a story from "Bob on the Internet" about the husband who finds out by looking in the marital collection box that his wife has been passing out favors to big spenders during the 50 years they have been married. These two stories are intimately related, and I didn't think either one was very funny. I'm 60 and have been married to the same woman for more than 40 years. Our two children are in their 30s now. Both are "mine," but one is and one isn't, if you get my drift. I love them both equally, but like "Spokane's" father, I have been deeply hurt. The snake who fathered the second child was supposed to be a good friend of mine. I had no idea of the betrayal until the child matured, and then, her resemblance to the real father was unmistakable. The matter is not discussed, even though I'm sure many people know the truth. What hurts is that no one has ever confessed or apologized. I have been completely faithful to this woman my entire life, even though I knew she dallied with others in addition to the snake many years ago. Things are OK between us, but someday, I hope she'll say she's sorry. -- Betrayed in Texas

Dear Texas,
You have been married 40 years, and now, you are bothered by what you perceive to be your wife's unfaithfulness throughout your marriage? You say you want a confession and an apology. If the situation is as you described it, why did you wait until now to seek some sort of closure? Your letter raises too many questions for me to be able to help you. I hope you will talk this over with a professional counselor, and the sooner the better. Please ask your physician to recommend someone. You need help.